I don't know about you, but this secular humanist thinks that the end times are going to be a blast!

O Canada!
Our league of pillow fights!
True referees in bow-ties will bark commands!

With soft pillows we swing and slap,
You will fall like a tree!

From right and left,
O Canada, we pillow fight for thee

God keep the soft cushions in our hands!
O Canada, we pillow fight for thee

O Canada, we pillow fight for thee

After extensive study scientists have announced that features of George Bush's skull may prove that he is the missing link between humans and Neanderthals. When reached for comment, however, the Neanderthal Anti-Defamation League (or NADL) strongly disputed the scientists' conclusions saying "while we Neanderthals may be a bit thickheaded, we have always thought that invading Iraq was an incredibly stupid idea."

Due to the surge in the popularity of Yoga, income has plummeted to all time lows for a group of Gurus that where once popular during the 1960 and early 1970s. As more and more disciples of these gurus are showing up in Yoga studios, the Gurus felt it was a good time to go on tour.

A humorous look at the Yoga world. A play on the real life trademark on a series of Yoga poses.

This obviously means that 89% of Americans are traitors; I guess they want to fight Al Qaeda here and not there. Don't they remember 9/11? I support my President right or wrong!

I would like to thank all of the hardworking paparazzi that showed up at just the right moment; I would also like to thank the bloggers for their tireless work in sending my commando photos all over the Internets; but most importantly I would like to thank Paris Hilton for showing me how to act like a lady.

--Britney Spears (from her Flasher of the Year acceptance speech)