What's wrong with these people? Oh right, they're evangelicals.

Yes, the parties involved are Republicans; and yes, Republicans are sex crazed lunatics.

Can I get Al Gore to help out?

To quote Paris Hilton: That's hot!

Help! Paris Hilton is taking over my blog (and really, no one wants to see me sans underwear.) Make it stop!

In America you can legally be paid to have sex in front of a camera, but if you remove the camera you will be arrested. What a bunch of sexually repressed (and obsessed) screwed up morons we are.

What if the condoms fail during testing? Who pays for child support?

The biggest problem? Razor burn.

It's called the iBuzz, and Apple doesn't like it.

I do enjoy the Theatre of the Absurd.

I'd like to thank my wife for nominating me for this award...

I never though I would say it, but there is scientific evidence to back up Cameron Diaz. While sex may not be the "best thing for everything" it may be good for a small portion of everything. Though I should point out, for teeth enhancement, some women might prefer a different zinc delivery system.

... according to the government.

Too late!

People want to have sex with Paris Hilton?

This is kind of cool (not the STDs part, of course).

I already figured that out from personal experience.

Can you carry the spray can around in your wallet?